Globecord - Dentyne Fire--Hot it is Not

Standing in line at the cafeteria purchasing a delicious tuna melt, I decided I would need something afterwards to purge the fishy taste from my tongue. Looking over the picked-over gum rack, I was saddened to find my usual brands had all but been purchased. However, the sadness soon passed for out of the corner of my eye, I spotted Cadbury Schweppes' latest foray into the Canadian chewing gum market, Dentyne: Fire. Eagerly anticipating the world of pain I was in store for, I purchased a pack, but as I would soon find out the only burning sensation this product would cause me was burning rage at how underwhelming this piece of this gum really was.

We here at GlobeCord have been keeping a pretty close eye on Cadbury Schweppes since their incomprehensible launch of C'Plus: Ruby Red a few years back. It is therefore with great sadness we report that management there hasn't quite figured out Marketing 101 yet. For you see, the best thing about Dentyne: Fire is the devilish wrapping.

When I first held the product in my hand I was struck by the flashy packaging and unlike all other blister pack gum, the pieces were actually red. But it all is downhill from here. When placed in your mouth, the implied burning is not there. At best the sensation is like a single cinnamon heart, maybe a 1 on the chili scale at Salad King. And, like a pair of sixteen-year olds in the back of dad's car, it's over in two minutes. Then all is left is a artificial cinnamon taste like so many we have tasted before.

In conclusion, this product is not actually bad like Sprite Ice, but the taste is not unlike Dentyne Ice: Cinnamon and rather uninspired. The intense, taste of fire promised by the brand name and package just isn't delivered, just disappointment. Here's a tip, Cadbury Schweppes executives: like Ralph Wiggum, we want a product that "tastes like burning", not another boring cinnamon chew. Go put that in your pipe and smoke it.